A coaching/growth mindset is an in control, successful mindset, which creates strength and resilience. It is the mind set of excellence and will set you apart fro others as a successful human being. Here are ten essential characteristics of a coaching mindset:
Everyone has a unique model of the world - Respect other people’s models of the world. They make sense of their world based on their understanding and experience of it. By recognizing this we can improve our communication with them by trying their world on for size and seeing through their eyes. This is an important principle for line managers who have a strong role in giving recognition. The meaning of communication is the response you get. Take responsibility for your communication.
People are not their behavior. It is important to distinguish between the two. It is not fair to say you are aggressive. The person’s behavior may be experienced by you as aggressive, but they, themselves are not aggressive. Having this mindset allows you to respond in a different way, adult to adult, rather than to the behavior. This can help in conflict resolution and building teams.
The meaning of all behaviour is dependent upon the context it appears in. In essence, what is appropriate in one setting may not be appropriate in another. Being decisive is appropriate in some situations e.g. in a crisis where as being decisive when people want to be consulted can be destructive. The person with the greatest flexibility of behaviour has the greatest influence on others. The ability to influence is a key competency of those in senior leadership positions and those aspiring to those positions.
All behaviour has a positive intention. When we take on this mindset we look for the positive, rather than the negative. It empowers us by giving us more options in terms of our response and also a growth mindset. Consider what was the other person trying to achieve, in fact if your own behavior is interpreted negatively communicate what your positive intention was. You can help yourself and others with this powerful mindset. This can be summed up as everyone is doing the best they can with the resources they have. The great news is that we can add to our resources whenever we choose to.
There are no unresourceful people, only unresourceful states. We are fortunate that if we do not currently have all the resources that we need to excel at home or at work then we can get them through a range of experiences and CPD. Unresourceful states include anger, sadness, fear, hurt and guilt. Resourceful states include optimism, positivity, growth, excitement and love. We can take this a stage further; believing that everyone has all of the resources they need to succeed and to achieve their desired outcomes is extremely empowering. We can see our role as helping ourselves and others identify, access and utilize these states.
There is no failure – only feedback. What holds us back from achieving our goals – most often fear. The belief that we will fail and all the emotions that go with that. Release yourself from the chains of failure. Much like it’s relation perfection – it simple does not exist. A useful reframe is there is no failure, only feedback. It is what you do with the feedback which wills et you apart from others. What is the learning that you can take from the feedback and apply to enable you to move forward positively.
Everyone is in charge of their mind and therefore their results. As Stephen Covey said “I am not a product of my circumstance. I am a product of my decisions”. Living at cause gives you the most control. Living at effect means things happen to you.
Resistance in someone is a sign of a lack of rapport. This is crucial. In order to succeed you depend on the support and buy-in of others. Rapport is one of the foundations of relationships. You can go in and out of resistance, but in order to get it back you must first recognize that you have lost it. How do you build rapport with people. What signs do you look for to monitor rapport?
You get what you focus on, so focus on what you want. Energy flows where attention goes so be careful where you shine your spotlight.
You create your own reality – you always have choices. You may not like the choices but you always have choices. For example, you can maintain status quo or you can do something different. It’s like dropping a pebble into a pond – there will always be ripples. Your beliefs about life also create your reality.
If you want to build and develop a coaching mindset to help you professionally and in your personal life then book onto our Certificate or Diploma in Coaching and Mentoring http://www.igcompany.co.uk. The next course begins on 9th May 2016.